Huckumentary Predictions

As most of you know Hollywood is going to premiere his documentary about the 07-08 Gnomes. I think it's fitting for me to give my preview of what we'll probably see in it.

• 15 minute (minimum) tribute to Eric Huber's calf muscles and bids, probably to the tune of this song
• Pat Moran spending the majority of his interview gushing about the only thing he misses from the ultimate team is Dave Riley (don't hate, they're dating)
• Hopefully some drunken confessions caught by the camera in the party footage which will probably carry the storyline. In particular I'm looking for Steve to admit that he really isn't a 16th black, Padula to admit that he's been applying to Missouri S&T for the past 3 semesters, and Sam to admit that he's had a threesome with Doug and Georgia at last year's Stanley Cup
  
• I'd also imagine that all of the good footage of us playing will probably be blocked by either Don or Georgia's back.
• Ashley Betke won't remember any of the premiere, so she'll have to watch it again the next day
  
• Pete Overright and Doug will be in the running for best dressed, but I think Doug will take it with one of his zazzle creations
• It'll easily shoot to the top of my favorite movies list

In short, I'm pumped and I can't wait for December 12th

Making the Team, Part III - Special Teams?

Leave it to Doug to write a special teams article about ultimate. As ridiculous as it sounds, I agree wholeheartedly with a solid 77% of the points he makes in this article. Enjoy.

"There are also many intangibles to being an A-team player. These are things off the field that set you apart.

• The first is spirit. Spirit is the most important rule in the game. Without it, we are just like athletes from any other sport. If you play on our A-team, you are representing the Gnomes. We’ve built a good reputation of being a fun team that plays hard and plays fair. We want you guys to want to win, we want you guys to play hard and leave it all on the field, but we want you guys to be fair. Other teams notice when teams are unspirited and it hurts our relations with them if we have players who aren’t.
• The second is being named Eric Huber. This helps a lot if you want to make the A-team.
  
• The third one is drive. Now I know that a lot of us got our licenses suspended, but that’s not what I’m talking about. I mean you have to want to win, and more importantly to be all that you can be. There are two kinds of drive: you can either say you want it or you can show you want it. Showing it means playing hard every second you’re in the game, wanting to play every point and every chance you get. It means getting someone to practice throwing with on the quad on an off day. It means going out in a -50 degree blizzard and doing sprints. Ok, maybe that last one was kinda extreme, but you get the idea. If you don’t want it, I don’t want you.
• Next, and possibly the most important, you need to have or have had a Mohawk. It’s aerodynamic and makes you jump higher, run faster, and last longer ;) if you know what I mean. You must also have the ability to suck up to Ryan, Steve, and myself. I love gifts and candy. [Editor's note: Doug also likes hugs] Also, your game must look like an art form like when Steve gracefully leaps over people and gets the disc at his highest point, or when Ryan fakes a dump cut and goes up the line like a gazelle, or when Shane shaves his head and then flexes in front of the mirror. It’s not enough to play good, it must also look good.